A comedic bathroom story told using banking related words.
Before you read on, in case you didn’t know, sticky rice is used in cooking in Asian cultures. You may have eaten it in sushi or mango sticky rice dessert. Some call it glutinous rice which may lead you to believe it contains gluten but it does not. The terminology is used because of it’s glue-like stickiness.
I forgot what happens if I eat too much sticky rice and I don’t drink enough water.
Two hours after my sticky rice meal I thought It was time to do some business in a seated position.. so, I headed to the throne.
As I sat down, I thought this business would be a normal deposit at the bank..
I was wrong.
I was on the throne for about 10 minutes in a bit of aching pain..
My stomach felt like there was a tropical storm being blocked at the exit by a gigantic elephant wall.
I decided that I should do some of my chants that I learned from my Buddhist friend. The chant: “Nam yo ho renge kyo” is what Buddhists say repeatedly while thinking of positive things they want to happen in life. In this case, The prayer was for only one thing, relief. I thought perhaps the vibrations of this repeated chanting out loud may soothe my aching pain and hopefully, open up some of the rolls of coins to set them loose.
I chanted for about 5 minutes but nothing happened. I decided to shift my body weight a bit to perhaps assist in my activity. Another 5 minutes went by and only a couple of coins dropped out of what felt like a humongous deposit in my bag of cash.
Because of time passing with relatively no activity, I thought I should bear the ache and prepare to go on with my day. I grabbed the un-inked receipt and as I began to get up, I could tell this transaction really wanted to be completed now.
I sat down again and continued chanting for another 5 minutes.. sweating..
The whole time i was on the throne, I think I was sweating more then I ever had in any hot yoga session.
It was time.
What I thought would end like a bank robbery complete with a huge explosion at the door to the walk-in safe.. or even.. a painful & gigantic withdrawal from a tiny ATM slot; Thankfully, ended in a very smooth transaction..
..with many well-inked receipts.
Thanks for reading. Until my next story, I’ve got to go drop some coins.